How To Be An Icon

The Weight of Comparison - Tom Graves on Disability and Inner Strength

Tom Graves is an athlete and everyday icon who has never let cerebral palsy define the limits of his life. From an early age, Tom pushed past the assumptions placed on him—not to prove anyone wrong, but to prove to himself that he could live fully, move freely, and embrace the challenges that came his way.
A passionate sports enthusiast, Tom has found strength, purpose, and identity through physical activity. But like so many of us, he’s also wrestled with the quiet pressures of comparison, especially in a world shaped by unrealistic standards and social media perfection.
In this episode, Tom opens up about the mental weight of constantly measuring yourself against others, the anxiety of social media and the quiet power of accepting who you are—even when the world tries to suggest otherwise.
Tom's story is one of grit, grace, and growth—reminding us that true strength comes not from being like everyone else, but from becoming deeply connected with who you already are.
If you'd like to get in touch with Tom, you can find him on Instagram: @graves_t10 
For support, more information or to donate, go to scope.org.uk or cerebalpalsy.org.uk
 

Unworthy of Love – Alex Devereux on Self-Doubt, Relationships & Fear of Failure

What happens when you don’t believe you deserve love? Alex Devereux opens up candidly about how his deep-rooted feelings of unworthiness led to the breakdown of his relationships, leaving him stuck in a cycle of self-sabotage and heartbreak.
We also explore his chronic fear of failure and how it affected his professional life, keeping him from taking risks and truly believing in his own potential. But beyond the struggles, Alex shares the lessons he’s learned about self-worth, setting boundaries, and what a healthy relationship actually looks like.
In this powerful and honest conversation, we discuss:
How feeling unworthy of love can sabotage relationships.
The negative impact of always giving without expecting anything in return.
Why healthy boundaries are essential and how to set them.
What a healthy relationship truly looks like—and how to break free from toxic cycles.
Overcoming the fear of failure and learning to show up fully in life and love.
Alex’s story is a reminder that putting yourself first isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. If you’ve ever struggled with self-doubt, unhealthy relationship patterns, or fear of failure, this episode will give you the insight and inspiration to start putting yourself first and how believing in ability is necessary in order to follow your dreams and do what you love. Passionate about personal development and developing others, Alex is full of wisdom and intelligence who you'll want to listen to and learn from on repeat. An episode you won't want to miss. 
You can find Alex on LinkedIn: Alex Devereux or through his website: ajdevereux.com
Useful links:
https://www.relate.org.uk/
 

Letting Go & Living for Yourself – Annie Blake on Self-Worth & Breaking Free from People-Pleasing

What happens when the people you trust the most betray, abandon, or deceive you? For Annie Blake, repeated heartbreak and betrayal left her questioning her own worth—wondering why she was never “good enough.” This led her down a path of people-pleasing, self-doubt, and anxiety, as she prioritized making others happy while completely losing herself in the process. We talk about relationship anxiety, particularly anxious attachment and how past experiences of betrayal can affect present relationships with partners. 
In this deeply honest and emotional conversation, Annie shares:
How betrayal and abandonment shattered her self-esteem.
Why people-pleasing became a survival mechanism—and how it led to panic attacks and anxiety.
How ignoring her true purpose led to suicidal thoughts and the wake-up call that changed everything.
The journey to letting go of the need to please others and finally learning to say NO without guilt.
Annie’s story is a powerful lesson in self-worth, boundaries, and the courage it takes to live for yourself. If you’ve ever felt like you’re losing yourself to make others happy, this episode is a must-listen. It’s time to stop seeking approval and start living life on your own terms.
 
If you or anyone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or struggling emotionally, here are some links to organisations you can reach out to: Please reach out to someone. You're never alone. 
If you would like to connect with Annie, you can find her on Instagram @activewithanniee or @annie_marie_blake
Useful links:
https://www.mind.org.uk
https://www.samaritans.org
https://www.papyrus-uk.org/
https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/
 
 
 
 

A Year from Hell – Ashley Sheen on Turning Pain into Strength

** Trigger Warning: References of suicide.
What happens when life throws everything at you all at once? Ashley Sheen knows this all too well. In just one year, he endured a health issue that required surgery (which didn’t fully succeed), the painful end of a long-term relationship, and the devastating news that two close family members had suffered life-changing health conditions.
In this raw and emotional conversation, Ashley opens up about his battle with anxiety and depression, how he shut himself off from those who cared about him, and the heavy toll that isolation took on his mental health. But through the darkness, he found his way back—learning that reaching out and talking was the one thing that saved him.
We discuss:
The reality of coping with multiple life-altering setbacks in a short period of time.
How shutting people out made things worse—and how he finally found the courage to open up.
The mental and emotional impact of anxiety and depression and what helped him through.
Why talking and asking for help isn’t weakness, but strength.
Ashley’s story is a powerful reminder that even in our darkest moments, we are never truly alone. His journey from suffering to resilience will leave you inspired to check in on yourself, open up to others, and find strength in vulnerability.
If you'd like to connect with Ashley, you can find him on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook @hownottosummon or Discord and YouTube @hownottosummonapodcast 
I couldn't have set up my own podcast without my sponsors @hownottosummonpodcast so a massive thank you as always. 
Useful links: http://www.samaritans.org
https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/feelings-symptoms-behaviours/behaviours/help-for-suicidal-thoughts/
https://856foundation.org.uk/mens-time/mens-time-to-talk/
 

No Fear, No Regrets – Matt Addis on Life After a Brain Tumour Diagnosis

What would you do if you found out your health would only get worse with time? Matt Addis was in his early twenties, working a regular job in a call centre, when he received a life-changing diagnosis—a brain tumour that would gradually take his hearing. Having struggled with ear issues since childhood, he knew something was wrong, but nothing could have prepared him for what came next.
In this candid and brutally honest conversation, Matt shares how his diagnosis flipped his perspective on life. Instead of giving in to fear or self-pity, he adopted a "fuck it, just do it" attitude, refusing to let the future steal his present. We talk about:
How he first realized something was wrong and the shocking diagnosis that followed.
Coming to terms with gradual hearing loss and how he navigates the uncertainty of the future.
The mindset shift that helped him embrace life with zero fear and zero regrets.
Why so many of us hold back from truly living—and how to stop waiting for the "right time."
Matt’s story isn’t about tragedy—it’s about freedom. His laid-back, no-nonsense approach to life will leave you questioning your own fears and inspiring you to stop hesitating and start living. Because, as Matt knows all too well, you never know what’s around the corner.
If you would like to connect with Matt, you can find him on Instagram @mattaddispt or on Facebook: Matt Addis
Useful Links: 
West Norfolk Deaf Association: http://www.wnda.org.uk 

Answers from a Life Coach – Finding Happiness & Accepting What We Can’t Change with Austen Moore

What does it really take to build a fulfilling life? How do we navigate setbacks, find happiness, and push through life’s toughest moments? In this episode, we sit down with Austen Moore, a renowned life and business coach, to get real, actionable insights on personal growth, resilience, and success.
Austen shares powerful mindset shifts, practical strategies for overcoming challenges, and how to align your life with what truly matters. We discuss topics such as:
Overcoming anxiety and why so many of us feel stuck in cycles of worry.
Why we don’t know ourselves enough and how self-awareness leads to lasting happiness.
Dealing with stress, overwhelm, anger, and other negative emotions in a healthy, productive way.
How to accept the things we can’t change and find peace in uncertainty.
Austen also opens up about a debilitating injury he suffered during a Thai kickboxing fight—a sport in which he holds a black belt. He shares how this life-altering moment forced him to redefine success, let go of what he couldn’t control, and rebuild his life with a new purpose.
This episode is packed with wisdom, real-life experience, and the tools you need to navigate life's toughest challenges. Tune in for an inspiring, thought-provoking conversation with the fearless and pragmatic Austen Moore.
 
If you would like to connect with Austen, you can find him through his website: austenmoore.com
 

Love, Loss, and Debt – Michelle O’Toole’s Journey Through Grief

Losing a loved one is never easy, but what happens when grief is tangled with anger, betrayal, and financial hardship? In this powerful episode, we sit down with Michelle O’Toole, who faced the heartbreaking loss of her father—only to discover the crushing debt he left behind. As she navigated the emotional weight of grief, Michelle also had to confront the unexpected financial burden, forcing her to balance mourning with survival.
She opens up about the complex emotions of loving someone while resenting the choices they made, how she found strength in the chaos, and the ways she learned to heal and move forward. This raw and honest conversation explores the messy realities of loss, the impact of financial stress on grief, and the resilience it takes to rebuild.
If you’ve ever struggled with complicated feelings after losing a loved one, this episode is for you.
If you want to connect with Michelle, you can find her on Instagram: @shell_otoole_photography or @otooles.on.tour
Useful links: 
https://www.cruse.org.uk/understanding-grief/
https://www.gov.uk/debt-advice
https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan/
 

Ultra Endurance Cyclist, Robbie Ferri - Riding the highs and lows of life

In this episode, we sit down with ultra-endurance cyclist and world record holder Robbie Ferri, who has conquered more countries on two wheels than anyone before him, having broken two world records. Robbie takes us inside the thrilling, gruelling, and sometimes terrifying world of ultra-distance cycling, sharing stories from the road—moments of pure exhilaration, near disasters, and the mental battles that come with pushing the human body to its limits and the lows experienced after the 'high' of an ultra endurance event. 
Beyond the physical challenges, Robbie opens up about his personal struggles with anxiety and depression, revealing how the solitude of the road can be both a place of healing and hardship. We explore the mindset required to keep going when everything tells you to stop, the importance of mental resilience, and how cycling became both an escape and a salvation. He offers ways in how to deal with challenges when everything feels out of control.
Join us for an inspiring and raw conversation about endurance, mental health, and the pursuit of something bigger than ourselves. 
 
If you want to connect with Robbie you can find him on Instagram: @ridingwithrobbie

The Money Laundering Trap - Ellora Howard

In this pilot episode, I sit down with Ellora to discuss how she found herself struggling financially while studying at university. She thought she had found the perfect side gig - easy money for minimal work. But what seemed like a lucky break quickly turned into a nightmare as she realised she was caught in the web of a money laundering scheme. 
In this gripping episode Ellora opens up about how she unknowingly fell for the deception, the moment she realised she was in too deep and the consequences that followed.
She shares the lessons learned, the impact it had on her life and what others should look out for to avoid falling into the same trap.
If you'd like to connect with Ellora you can find her on Instagram @elloraadventures or TikTok: @ellorahoward
Thanks to our sponsors How Not To Summon A Podcast. You can find them on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or any good podcatcher app.